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5 Things God Knew I Needed When He Brought Me This Man - Dephne Madyara

5 Things God Knew I Needed When He Brought Me This Man

1) A Sense of Humour
I was a very serious person, had 0% sense of humour and was somewhat very quiet. I needed someone to come in my life to loosen me up and help me see the simple side of life. I needed to laugh till my stomach hurts though sometimes when I’m upset at him, he makes me laugh when I don’t want to smh 😩 Each day has its measure of smiles & laughs and it made me see that this is how simple life should be! Now I crack jokes, laugh at myself and smile through life. Of course this is also through the enabling of the Holy Spirit; the fruit of joy. Infact, I don’t go a day without laughing!

2) An Appreciation For Flowers
I hated flowers because they die quickly and I didn’t see the purpose of taking care, let alone buying something that was going to die in 3-7 days! However, getting flowers randomly from this guy made me to slowly appreciate the tenderness, smell, beauty & artistry of flowers. I can say that I now like (a lot) flowers and my favourite are roses (red) & tulips (white or golden yellow). I find that flowers also make me smile and feel warm inside (clearly my appreciation for flowers is getting deep lol). Do you feel like this too?


3) Finding Comfort in My Authenticity & Gifts
To not be influenced to be someone else became important to me more than I realised. It’s important to have people around us that sharpen us to be our best self and not a caricature of someone else. I’ve had people in the past tell me to speak/teach more like pastor so and so. I even had someone tell me that my books were too serious and hard core Christian! None of those people are in my life today; they were seasonal friends! Thanks be to God for a friend who sticks closer than brother (see Proverbs 18:24). I’m able to grow and mature in myself and be the best version of me through his Spirit-filled encouragement, support, kindness & security (not threat) in my anointing/gifts. I’m not exaggerating or making this up but he is the epitome of a Ephesians 5:26 man.

4) Rising In Vision & Perspective
Visionaries make you see beyond your today. I'm able to see life 10-30+ years from now and don't need to worry about today/today's' season nor the hows and whys of getting there. We literally have our lives planned 1-10+ from now and know where we are going; by being able to go into God's presence to get His confirmation of what we see today regarding tomorrow (see Heb 4:16).


5) Discovering That I Love Chivalry
Opening the doors, helping me to wear my coat, opening the car door... now the car door thing was so weird in the beginning when he would do this for me because I would try first to open the door then hesitate because he was about to, then he hesitates because I already did 😂 so we ended up like a broken record playing on a beautiful phonograph! However, with time I learnt the art of receiving Chivarly and falling in love with it. Now, before we get in the car I literally just stand there waiting for him to open the door so I get in  and when he forgets I say "aren't you forgetting something". I'm still getting used to him pulling the chair for me 😢 cause I pull it before he gets rounds to doing it smh 😔

LADIES WHAT THINGS HAS YOUR BEST FRIENDS, BOYFRIEND, FIANCÉ or HUSBAND brought out of you that you didn't know or think could be brought out? Comment below!

Love Dephne

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  1. It’s great that you’ve found your “Boaz”. 🙂
    I typically follow you on youtube, & saw the vlog of you shopping for your wedding dress like over a year ago…but I haven’t seen any updates pertaining to WHEN you actually plan on getting married, so just wanted to make sure I didn’t miss any updates!

  2. I Thank God for your life my dear. This was beautiful. I pray the Lord continue to bless you and him!! Much love, SIlvia

  3. Hi Dephne,

    I have been following you for awhile now (all the way from Suriname , South America) and this post really hit home for me.
    Glory be to God but only He knows what we really need. He knows everything about us, and from the mother’s womb. (Jer. 1:5).

    I have learned patience and more specifically waiting on and trusting the Lord as well, I now also have a sense of humor and compassion. Of course the chivalry thing as well. Major!

    But more importantly I’ve learned that sex can be enjoyed and that it is sacred and holy once it’s in a Christ-centered marriage, between husband and wife. This to me is huge because as I was sexually abused as a child I was never able to enjoy sex. But Glory to God for sending me the right person that could help me heal, accept my body, forgive and move on.

    God bless you xoxo!

  4. Truly God knows what we need even before we even know we need them. He places the right people in our lives to bring out the real beauty in us.

    I am always encouraged when I read your posts Dephne ,God bless you. And I know very well He’s preparing the best man to suit me, cos I’m a handful lol.

  5. Rejoice

    Girl I am so happy for you, that you have had a chance that many young ladies would not have the opportunity to experience. I have got to hate all the stuff your man has got you to appreciate. I used to love flowers. But my husband told me flowers represent death, I used to be free spirited now I have to get serious. I had a dream but now I just live an aimless life.
    So I thank God that young women like you have a fear of God and a good man who will bring out the best in you. Continue smiling, and ministering to young ladies who have no hope.

  6. Cherish

    Oh and I forgot to mention about chivalry. I can totally relate to you haha. So used to being a DIY person but glad you are getting the hang of it lol.

  7. Cherish

    Hey Dephne

    Thanks for the post and for sharing. I loved the part about being able to see into the future as you go into God’s presence as well as not being pushed to being something you are not. I have experienced seasons in my life where I felt I was being pressurised in a direction that actually wasn’t for me. I am not in a relationship and I know that in God’s perfect time, the right man for me will come. May the Lord continue to bless you both as you continue shining the light of God to the world. And the books…too Christian! That is exactly what the world needs because that is were the real answers lie. God bless. Much love.

  8. This is beautiful and always a blessing and honour for you to share your experiences in your walk with God sis Dephne. We thank God for bringing you two together and pray that you grow stronger in every way as you share your lives together to his glory.
    For me and my husband its as if God knew we needed each other. He makes me feel like the bride in Ephesians 5:26 haha!. I had so many imperfections when I met him. Still do lol am a work in progress. He is like my personal coach lol. He has been instrumental in me becoming who God wants me to be. He is an example of authenticity, the kind that is required for any child of God to accomplish a God given task.Not to brag but true.I, on the other side am his spiritual helper. God knew he needed a spiritully strong woman to help him align with his purposes for his life. Only God can bring two people who can balance each other in such a way. All for his glory, the auther of marriage.Praise be to God.

  9. Jazmynne

    This post was so cute. I literally laughed loud about the awkwardness with him opening the door and pulling the chair. That is real romance! So happy for you ❤️

  10. Mozeh casta

    yes sist, I appreciate your teachings and they have empowered me so much that am eagerly waiting for my friend ,lover and wife yeah just waiting on my father’s timing to get the rib out of me !!

  11. Dephne,

    I love this. Everyone is different and I love that your fiance fits you:) I am not in a romantic relationship yet, but i have friends who God has placed in my life to sharpen me. I love how my best friend challenges me in the Word. I also love how she lovingly tells me when i’m wrong. I love how encouraging my older sisters in Christ are and how I can be myself with them and they celebrate me and build on my strengths instead of tearing me down because of my weaknesses.

  12. Makeda Russell

    Girl, I love you! Your words are gems to me….I’ve learnt so much from you, even just now! Can’t really comment at the moment, no special person and God is shifting some things in my friendship life. The other day I came across Proverbs 18 v 4(GN translation) which says:” A person’s words can be a source of wisdom, deep as the ocean, fresh as a flowing stream”; immediately you came to mind. Thats what your words means to me sis…thanks!I sent you an email on your contact page about a book query.

  13. Wow Dephne, that so awesome, such a gentleman! Has your fiancee always been such a gentleman, even before you became engaged?

  14. Donna Hales

    This was so beautiful and encouraging. I will be praying for you guys as you mature in Christ.

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